Butchery Is Childsplay

8 Aug

Whether it’s continuing education classes, or competitions at food events, evidence of a growing interest in the nearly-lost art of animal butchery is all around us. Leave it to the folks at Schleich, the same forward-thinking German toy designers who brought us the Smurfs, to anticipate a child’s curiosity in the burgeoning trend.

And leave it to the crack team of investigative reporters here at stuntfoodways.com to secure the first images of this secret new toy line. Made from the same highly detailed, quality casting that has made the toy line a favorite of deep-pocketed parents the world over, a new line, Primal Cuts, now offers kids a toy with all the classic primal cuts clearly delineated on the hide of a cow, pig and sheep.

Cow with beef primal cuts chart

Pig with pork primal cuts chart
mutton with chart

The line (rumored to be expanding to lamb, chickens, ducks, turkeys, rabbits, goats and possibly a horse) encourages kids to identify the source of those cuts of meat they eat every day (below right).Ooh, now there's a hard one lad, where does that Newport steak come from?

The new toy line allows kids to identify and locate the cuts of meat they eat everyday

An ambitious youngster can even use the clearly marked charts to memorize each cut (left).

Each toy comes with its own primal cut chart so kids can study and memorize every cut right down to the brisket

We at Stunt Foodways cheer the progressive thinking of the good folks in Schwäbisch Gmünd who are working to make learning about the harvesting and butchery of animal protein fun. High quality cuts of meat have always been enjoyable; now, with the new Primal Cuts line of domesticated animals, meat can also be a game.

Of course, not everybody approves of the new line. British television personality, celebrity pin-up and Peta activist Jodie Marsh has responded to the new Primal Cuts toy line by (apparently) tattooing her naked body with a primal cuts chart. This dedicated act of protest was, in all likelihood, undertaken before elective surgery to greatly increase the size of her breasts

Peta activist Jodie Marsh tattoos entire body with primal cut chart to protest German toy manufacturer's new line

At press time neither Jodie Marsh nor her representative at Intrigue Management could be reached for comment, though Marsh, has been outspoken in support of the rights of food animals including chicken in the past.

It’s a big world full of people.

5 Responses to “Butchery Is Childsplay”

  1. boscodagama August 8, 2011 at 6:46 pm #

    Kinderspiel! Ja gewiß!

  2. carolina August 9, 2011 at 11:15 am #

    Cool! Looks like these toys would be a great learning tool for anyone wanting to become a butcher. They’d be useful to historical hearth cooks like me, too, as I should know the basics of how to butcher most any meat.

  3. Manny Howard August 9, 2011 at 11:38 am #

    In der Tat. Je mehr Spaß Kinder haben mit Fleisch, desto glücklicher werden sie.

  4. funny t shirts uk January 1, 2012 at 8:20 pm #

    Hi my friend! I want to say that this article is awesome, great written and come with almost all significant infos. I’d like to peer more posts like this .

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Weekend Link Love - Edition 155 | Mark's Daily Apple - August 14, 2011

    [...] Geography shmeography. An upcoming line of toys promises to teach your kids how to navigate a pig, cow, or sheep carcass. [...]

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